while he has caught a few rabbits, he's no friend of mine.
if it weren't for the shedding, and the h-mp-ng, dragging his behind on the carpet, "playfully" scratching and bruising the boys, the licking in specific places, waking me all through the night with ear flapping, peeing out of excitement, peeing out of fear, and occasionally peeing in the house for no apparent reason, [how is it a dog can pee on demand-anytime, anyplace?] puking in the car, all the money we've spent on vets, the disintegration of anything left on the floor, [note to self-do not leave dirty diapers, even when wrapped five times in a plastic bag, anywhere within reach] knocking down everybody in his path when barreling down the stairs, the vapors he expels under my desk when i'm trying to work, trying to find dogsitters, [even more unwilling than babysitters in my family] sticking his tongue in my mouth when i least expect it, digging, tearing up the garden, angering the neighbors by standing right outside their gate teasing the two pit bulls who could eat him for breakfast...
if it weren't for that, i think i'd like him.
the boys still like him in spite of all this however, so i guess i won't make good on my daily threat to send him to the pound just yet. but we've got to have rules. since we have officially begun our triple digits season and sirius is losing hair* like he's suddenly inherited the gene for male-pattern baldness, we've now quarantined all carpeted areas in our house. behind bars is exactly where i like him, so if you're one of those adults who can't figure out how to open baby gates, you may not get far in our house. but at least you'll be able to set your crawling baby on the carpet without him coughing up a hairball and sit on our couch without us having to supply lint rollers to all our guests as parting gifts.
at least you can do that.
now paying us a visit without getting a "special hug" from sirius, i can't make any promises.
*btw-does anybody know how to train a dog not to pee when i try to vacuum him?
hound dog - elvis
4 comments:
uh, gee. this has convinced me to stick to my guns forevermore - no dogs. i'm satisfied with gabriel stopping the neighbors walking their dogs to get his doggie fix. (and i think i'll keep my distance from serius and his specials hugs. i never have been much of a hugger.)
p.s. i could have done without the rabbit catching pic. ew. i hope you made joe take care of that.
if it makes you feel any better rachel, that little red spot by the rabbit is not blood it's a piece of a balloon. sirius didn't like, tear it to pieces or anything. i think he probably just scared it to death. he kept just looking at it lay there like he couldn't understand why it didn't want to play anymore.
lol. oh man, life's lessons. What happened to Sirius' list of enchanting attributes of yore?
great story-telling :)
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